You’ve scrutinized your resume with a fine-tooth comb and ironed your outfit of choice. Questions like “What are your strengths? What are your weaknesses?” have tormented you for nights on end. You adjust your Zoom lighting as you prepare for a conversation that will largely determine your future. It’s the day of your… roommate interview?
Okay, maybe this is a tad dramatic, but just because this interview isn’t landing you a big promotion doesn’t mean it won’t influence your quality of life for the next six to 12 months. Cohabitation is tricky and finding a suitable roommate can be the difference between a harmonious home and an experience that’s, how can we put this— good for the plot.
So put in your due diligence now and thank us later. The questions you ask a potential roommate not only give insight into your future roomie’s preferences, habits, and standards, but illuminates to them what you value. If you’re striving for compatibility (or even just cordiality), it’s important you remain transparent, honest, and treat this as a two-way conversation. Here are 25 questions to ask potential roommates before setting your move-in date in stone.
Preferences
What are your views on COVID-19 precautions?
It’s not something discussed in historic roommate interviews, but it’s certainly a hot topic now. Dirty plates in the sink are no longer your most important germs to worry about. No matter your safeguards, cohabitate living means two social bubbles are becoming one. Home is where the masks come off and the truth comes out, so if your views on vaccinations, social distancing, or masking differ, it’s best to air it out now rather than later.
What is your pet policy?
Whether it’s to your delight or dismay, finding out a potential roommate owns a pet means there’s a secondary roommate you’ll need to evaluate. Although this may be an ideal scenario for some, a pet in the apartment surfaces some additional factors worth noting.
Pets can be noisy, destroy property, or injure residents and visitors. Ultimately, they come with risk and liability concerns. For these reasons and more, if landlords allow furry friends, there are usually higher rents or extra fees involved. Can your potential roommate fully cover pet rent, a higher security deposit, or potential damages? Who will watch the pet when your roommate is at work or on vacation? These are points you’ll want to hit.
On the flip side, if you are bringing a terrier, tabby, or tortoise to the mix, let that be known now rather than later. Some people aren’t animal lovers, have inhibiting allergies, or simply prefer a complex with a strict no pet-policy.
Are you introverted or extroverted?
Some of the most iconic duos (take Anna and Elsa for example) were mismatched on this front— and that’s perfectly okay! The difference between being an introvert or an extrovert is simply how you recharge.
Introverts can be incredibly social yet require an hour or two of solitude to feel refreshed. Extroverts can work autonomous careers yet need a night out with friends to feel like their best selves. Knowing how your potential roommate is wired and vice versa can avoid aggravation and hurt feelings.
What’s your ideal indoor temperature?
The thermostat— the holy grail of a shared residence. Perhaps you’re cold-blooded, or maybe you prefer to sleep under your 10-pound weighted blanket. Whatever your preferences, you’ll want to assess whether your potential roommate is in alignment. Constantly adjusting the thermostat or bringing it to an unusually high or low temperature will cost you and your roomie money. To keep electric bills low, it’s best to secure a roommate with similar temperature preferences.
What is your idyllic apartment vibe/aesthetic?
Before binding yourselves in roommate-matrimony, you’ll want to get a sense of your potential roommate’s energy. Some living conditions are closer than others, meaning your personal space may be a little less personal and a little more communal.
If aligning on decorations and themes is important to you, you’ll want to ask this question during the interview. Curtain color preference is one thing, but if your potential roommate is a free spirit with an eclectic decorating sense and you’re more of the modern minimalist— either compromise or discord is in your future.
What are your preferred sleeping conditions?
If you’re sharing a bedroom, studio apartment, or your complex simply has thin walls, asking your potential roommate this question is essential. While some prefer to snooze with a white noise machine, others may require complete silence, or *knock on wood* a blaring television.
Sleep is essential to your health, productivity, and mood so ensure you ask your potential roommate their recipe for a perfect night of Z’s before sealing the deal.
Do you have any food restrictions/ allergies?
The answer to this question could be a deal-breaker or simply a cautious heads-up.
If you’re a lifelong vegan, sharing food prep space with a steak enthusiast may be a less than ideal arrangement. On the flip side, if you have a severe food allergy, you’ll want to make your potential sous chef is aware as soon as possible so the kitchen remains a safe space for everyone.
Finances
How do you want to split the cost of rent and utilities?
It’s not always as simple as 50-50 and it’s something you’ll want to ask your prospective roommate during your preliminary interview. Some two-bedroom apartments come with a primary bedroom. These rooms can include an attached bathroom, more square footage, or a walk-in closet. Ask if your roommate has a preference on which room they occupy, and how much this should affect rent. Perhaps one of you will be working from home and consequently using more electricity and water. How do you prefer to split utility costs? And what if one of you is gone a week for vacation? Will the percentages change again?
Discussions around finances are usually a little awkward if you haven’t met before but asking your potential roommate about financial expectations can free you from even more awkward conversations down the line.
What do you do for a living?
This question will illuminate a couple of things for you. It will key you into your future roomie’s interests, stability, and income level. Although it may seem invasive to inquire how your roommate pays rent, a prospect that’s between jobs or working a gig without a steady salary could cause you trouble later.
If this isn’t someone you know well and can vouch for, it’s risky to put your credibility and rental property on the line. A steady, reliable job is a good sign that rent payments will be rolling in on time.
Have you ever missed a rent payment?
Oof. My non-confrontational self cringes just typing this question, but it must be done. This is a valid and relevant query to ask a potential roommate, and a fair question for them to ask you in return.
Although you may decide to split the rent up a certain way, you can both be evicted if your roommate can’t hold up their end of the bargain. If your roommate falls short, there are options to minimize the damage, but best to avoid this situation altogether by asking the right questions upfront.
Relationships
Have you had a roommate before?
Cohabitation is a skill that takes practice to perfect. If your future roommate is moving straight out of their family’s home and in with you, it could be cause for alarm. There’s a learning curve when it comes to the transition from co-dependence to independence. Although there’s a chance this will be a non-issue, be wary if you’d be someone’s first roommate and there are no former references to contact.
If yes, what’s your current relationship with them like?
This sly question could be a sneak peek into your future. All roommates are bound to butt heads occasionally, but if this question is met with a string of nasty remarks about a nightmare ex-roomie— stay on high alert!
Although exceptions are out there, it takes two to tango. Someone who will not own up to any part of an existing conflict is certainly suspicious. Best case scenario, this question is met with glowing accounts of past cohabitants, some of which you may be able to call as a reference.
How do you handle conflict?
Poor conflict resolution skills can often exasperate a minor conflict into a more pressing issue. In the chance that conflict does arise between you and your roommate, how will they respond? Will you be able to resolve it maturely or will it be unnecessarily agitating?
Some people are prone to holding onto small grievances until they bubble over with frustration. Others want to get everything out in the open as quickly as possible. Some will bring up discrepancies over text, while others prefer to chat it out face to face. Knowing how your roommate handles issues ahead of time will help you communicate with them more successfully and solve problems more efficiently.
Are you looking to be close friends with your roommate, or do you prefer to keep your lives separate?
This is one of the most important questions to ask a potential roommate! Not only does it set an expectation for what the relationship will look like, but it opens the door for the other party to reflect on what they are looking for in a living companion.
Someone who prefers to keep their lives separate will probably not be too keen on sharing food, wardrobes, or any other belongings. On the other hand, some people look for roommates when moving to a new, unknown city. They could be banking on making a close friend to explore, go out, and shop with. Maybe they are even interested in joining your existing social circle or vice versa. Discussing this expectation upfront will mitigate expectations and ensure happy parties on both ends.
Are you in any romantic relationships?
AKA, am I going to be involuntarily signing up for a third roommate? A romantic partner likely means your new digs will have a frequent guest. This could result in a higher water bill, less privacy, and potentially feeling left out in your own home. It doesn’t have to be all bad, though. This romantic partner could be someone you don’t mind having around or someone you even enjoy hanging out with. But you’ll want to explore this topic thoroughly before making any steadfast decisions with your prospective roommate.
What are your friends like?
If you’re hoping to be friends with your roommate, this question can be a great way to determine if you will mesh. What are their existing friends like? What kind of people do they tend to surround themselves with?
Chances are these people may be spending some time in your place as well, so it’d be great to feel out if you think you’d vibe with them. Ask about hosting gatherings. Is this something your potential roommate does often? How does their answer align with your life and work routine?
What’s your policy on overnight visitors?
Whether it’s a long-term boyfriend, extended family from out of town, or a stranger you’ve never met, you want to have clear standards set in place for overnight guests. Hotels are pricey, and a roommate could easily assume that their guests should save money by spending a night at your place. How often are you both comfortable with this scenario? Your routines, sanity, and sense of security might be on the line.
Habits
Do you smoke?
Smell, personal history, religious beliefs, fire hazards, and health concerns are just a few reasons someone could opt for a smoke-free roomie. If this is a habit of yours, you’ll want to be transparent and disclose it during your initial roommate interview.
Smoking in public areas is normally not allowed and apartments often follow a strict no-smoking policy. If your prospective roommate smokes or vapes, you’ll want to ensure they will comply with landlord requests, keeping you both out of trouble and safe from pricey fines.
Do you tend to cook at home or eat out?
If Gordon Ramsey’s reality shows have taught us anything, it’s that having more than one cook in the kitchen can be a recipe for disaster. Beyond that, more cooks in the home mean more ingredients, sauces, and seasoning. Discuss what sharing space in a refrigerator and pantry will look like. Do they prefer to grocery shop together or keep provisions separate?
What are your cleaning habits?
Ah, cleanliness— a major pillar of being a desirable roommate. How clean are they and how clean (according to your preferences) is clean enough? How they tidy up space behind their bedroom door may not affect you much, but when cohabitating, there are several key communal spaces at play.
Are you looking for a roommate to deep clean the living room with you every Sunday? Are you the toss-your-used-towel-on-the-floor type? If you and your prospective roommate prioritize different aspects of the chore list, perhaps splitting up responsibilities and maintaining an adequate space will be simple and easy.
What shows (if any) do you like to watch?
On the surface this sounds like a fun get-to-know-you question, but we have a sneaky hidden agenda. Roommates often share a television in the living area and drastically different viewing preferences can signify trouble ahead. If your downtime in front of the TV is important to you, it’d be helpful to know if this potential roommate could be a future binge-watching buddy or a motive for steering clear of the common areas. If your roommate is an intense gamer and you are not, this could cause issues as well. A roommate that stays up late gaming could cause noise issues, rack up a pricier electric bill, and jeopardize your TV time.
Routine
Do you work from home, in the office, or both?
For many, the increase in remote work during the pandemic has been full of perks. Millions of employees worldwide are free of long commutes, pricey childcare, and yes, uncomfortable shoes. Unfortunately for renters, there’s a flip side to the work-from-home wonderland. If you or your potential roommate works virtually, a homestead could quickly become an office space.
A work-from-home roomie could mean less privacy for you, a potentially stressful atmosphere, and a pricier utility bill. With increased internet usage, they may even want to opt for higher speed internet. When asking your roommate about their career, be sure to assess how your work lives will mesh or become a source of tension.
How does an average day look for you?
Do we have an early bird or night owl on our hands? And does it matter to you? Getting a feel for someone’s routine will inform you how to best schedule your own.
Opposite schedules do have their benefits. You won’t be stepping on each other’s toes in the kitchen, taking a shorter than optimal shower, and you’ll have more time to yourself. If their routine and schedule are compatible with yours, chances are higher that the roommate will be too.
How do you get around?
There are plenty of reasons, especially when trying to save money in a big city, to opt to remain car-less. Some apartment complexes offer ample public transportation nearby. If one of you owns a car, you’ll want to set a precedent so one of you isn’t becoming a part-time chauffeur.
Parking situations also vary from property to property. If you or your prospective roommate has a vehicle, you’ll want to check whether parking is available, plentiful, and cost-free.
Do you travel often?
In other words, will I have the apartment to myself occasionally? A traveling roommate can mean more privacy, cheaper utilities, and shameless control of the remote. However, if you’d constantly be responsible for tossing spoiled food, watering plants, and cat sitting, there could be cause for agitation. Ask your potential roomie how often they spend the night elsewhere, whether it’s for work or pleasure.
Roommates are a great way to save on rent, split up household chores, and make a live-in friend. Don’t let a lack of preparation in your roommate interview jeopardize what could be an amazing arrangement. Asking a future roommate the right questions will increase your chances of a fabulous cohabitation experience.
